I’ve been meaning to write a bit about #mumlife #parenting #babbies #othersuchhashtags.
When I was a pregbot, I eagerly read around (floozy!) for recommendations. What things do I need to have straight away? What should I take to the hospital? What other things should I get that I don’t even know that I need yet? How many baby clothes should I have already? What pram? Should I get a baby carrier? Should I read any books? Oh my dog there are so many books and so much advice I feel like I’m drowning under the pressure to learn about babies (and not be a ditz) AND therefore to consume the reams of information that are out there!
I’ve wished I was excellent at interviewing. I’ve wished I could have some magical skill — talk to someone for an hour and just know if they’ll be great at their job and great to work with, or not.
Unfortunately, I think there’s a tendency, when hiring, to be too optimistic about the whole thing. You need a new staff member. There’s a gap. Someone is about to leave. For whatever reason, you’re really hoping you’ll find the right person soon. Especially if someone else (like a manager) has done some pre-interviewing, and now they’ve shared their shortlist of candidates with you… they’ve already rejected a bunch of people. This is their shortlist! They are subconsciously, if not consciously, hoping you’ll be impressed with (at least!) one person from their shortlist. There’s pressure on you. Find the nugget! Accept one of them! Be wowed! For dog’s sake, you can’t possibly reject all of them!
In my experience, though, the nuggets are super rare. Well, I guess I am talking specifically about the digital industry. And chicken nuggets.
I appreciated this piece, Why job interviews are pointless, in The Guardian. I didn’t feel so lame about my interviewing skills after reading that. Turns out, we/I should have been more interested in the candidates’ reputations than in interviewing them. How many recommendations could they bring us? Interesting.
I tried. I thought I was doing the right thing. I made lists and lists in my paper planner – LIFE ORG, LOVE, WRITING, ME, NEWBY, WORK, HOME – and months went by.
I still have this super cute planner that I take everywhere, and all the tasks get out of my head and onto paper, which is great, but they don’t… actually… get… done.
Sometimes I think of things I’d like to blog about, but it’s never at a good time. Just when I’m falling asleep. Or just when the baby is falling asleep and I have (potentially) 1-2 precious hours to… do something really important, like answer emails. Or when I’m driving. Or when I’m trying to feed the baby his lunch and he’s persistently scooping the food back out of his mouth with his fingers, dropping it on the floor, and then very cutely exclaiming, “Uh oh!”
There are grubby handprints all over the lower-half of our Sony TV.
Sunday morning: Kit is having his morning nap, James is meditating, I’m having some quiet blog time, the dog is asleep in the sun.
I think, still, one of the most important things that I can do for my brain is to leave my phone on Airplane Mode in the morning. Something happens when you get all your notifications and app badges displaying new content… your brain is no longer on the big/wide picture, your brain just goes to specifics. This-person-did-this. This-scientific-breakthrough. Need-to-reply-to-that.
I remembered the nausea (not because it was terrible, but because that’s the most oft-repeated question throughout the whole pregnancy: “Do you have morning sickness?”) and the big belly. Funny how everything else vanished from my memory, until it happened again.
I completely forgot about the extreme fatigue and the severe thirst. So, pregnancy #1, I had nausea, fatigue and thirst from about weeks 5–7. This time around, the fatigue lasted from weeks 5–10. Maybe because I couldn’t sleep anytime I wanted to… I had a baby to chase around. But both times, it was incredible fatigue. I wondered if my personality had changed, permanently. I couldn’t imagine ever feeling motivation or ambition again. I just wanted to sleep and watch TV and be passive.